Just returned from 4 days in Sydney at Stillness in Action – a retreat to build skill in mindfulness. I feel the need to meditate to support my body in this stage of survivorship. I found it tough the first 2 days into the training- on the first sitting of 45 minutes I am sure I could hear 3 inner conversations running parallel with background music! Took me a while to settle in the moment and to understand the concept of ‘self compassion’: where I don’t give myself a hard time for having a mind like a monkey and instead let the thoughts come as welcome guests until I can find my way back to the ‘now’. Have been good at being compassionate for others but managed to be pretty tough on myself over the years. Always found it hard to accept praise or even to let applause in physically as I was too busy thinking how I could do it better next time and what was not perfect in any presentation. The experience has slowed me down. Has to be a good thing. I am appreciating small improvements from the curling of my new hair to the near normal nail growth coming through under the rings of chemo damage on the shattered old ones. Brad Marsellos of ABC Open interviewed me about the photo of the scars recently and it has gone to air and been picked up by Breast Cancer National so it is out there somewhere doing its thing.